I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
