I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
