this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
