Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
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