it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
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