I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I supernannyed him into submission
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Randomize
