I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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