But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
