oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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