why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
