forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
