your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
