well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Randomize