Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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