So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
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