THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
This baby is an asshole
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
