i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Randomize
