I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
