I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Randomize