my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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