yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
