omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize
