No, drunk sperm still make babies.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
