You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
