redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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