I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
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