That's intense
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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