there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
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