Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
