Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
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