So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
