He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
Randomize