Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
