just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
