Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize