She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
