is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
