READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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