i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
