How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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