We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
