Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Randomize
