just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
