So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
