Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize