he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
