kristin has been a bad kristin
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Randomize
