do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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