i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
So many bounce houses so little time
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
