I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
My feet surprised me
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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