Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Randomize
