And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize
