So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize